Susan Neder

Archive for July, 2012|Monthly archive page

A Sense of Humor

In Uncategorized on July 31, 2012 at 2:43 am

 

Of all the things we think we need when we go into a hospital, the only thing we really need is our sense of humor.

I have been in the hospital twice in the last two weeks – once for surgery and then a second time to treat infections I got during my first stay. Hospitals are full of brilliant, kind people who take care of their patients, but the ambience is somewhat lacking. Maybe it is all that linoleum or those strange looking machines that beep constantly. Rose Medical in Denver is better than most – they have carpet and pictures on the wall, which really helps. And, if that is not fancy enough for you, I discovered they they also have a number of fancy suites on the surgical floor that are accessible only by coded keypad. The reception area looks like a five star hotel, and each suite has two rooms and marble baths,etc. Food is prepared by their own chef. Yep. a guy in a tall chef’s hat and black and white striped trousers, pushing a flambe cart.

Really, people? Really? I do not know how many thousands of dollars it costs to stay in there, but the nurses said that it is for celebrities and very wealthy people who want extra privacy. I did see one patient arrive in a Bentley, with an entourage of minions. He looked like a hip-hop mogul. My question was, does recovery from surgery hurt less in there? I decided no on that – in fact if you laid there and thought about what it was costing you to have your own chef bring you jello, it might even hurt more!

I was much happier out with the “riff-raff”. My daughter-in-law and youngest daughter decorated my room like a tiki bar, complete with white lights and drink umbrellas and hulaed around the room to cheer me up. It worked, of course, and it also cheered up the nursing staff who all came in to get leis so they could say they’d been “leid” at work! A sense of humor and a sense of fun is much more valuable than marble baths and a silly looking chef!

No They Don’t Cleanse Like Carmen No More….

In Uncategorized on July 11, 2012 at 4:13 pm

Image

As I look at this picture, I think to myself, in light of recent developments, perhaps I should have eaten what is on top of the hat instead of wearing it….. oh well. Too late now! The latest development in the “Battle of the Netherlands” is surgery, as well as various herbal remedies that I will tell you more about later.

We are working on a song to  commemorate this event, but we need some help with the lyrics, so we have decided to have a contest for the best lyrics and we hope everyone will get into the swing of this and submit some suggestions. The tune is “Bye Bye Miss American Pie” and the first line is : “Bye Bye to my lower GI,”they found the answer to the cancer but it makes everyone sigh,”. Will has some other lyrics but they may not be printable, so please help us out here. Just remember it has to be funny. Once we have the entire song we might do a YouTube video!

Now since this is a contest you might ask what the winning prize is. My friends, Mary and Don McKeehan are providing that. They have a successful printing business here in town, but times being what they are, they have started a side business to help make ends meet. They are doing colon cleanses in their garage for much less cost then some of the other places around town. I am not completely sure how they are doing it, but I know it involves a ping pong table and a garden hose. It is recommended that you bring your own garden hose, but that is not required. I am certainly going to endorse everyone getting their colon cleansed. The McKeehans are also researching colon flossing as an added service. We all know flossing anything is also a good idea, so I am desperately hoping they get the details of how to do this worked out.

Please get behind this effort because we need these lyrics and if you win the prize it is freely transferable to anyone you think deserves it more than you do.  Also feel free to put my picture up on your refrigerator as a reminder to step up your colon cleansing regimen. This is as important as changing the oil in your car, and Mary and Don could use the money!

As I write this, surgery is coming right up. But as you read it, I’ll be in recovery. So please put some lyrics on facebook – it is probably best if you don’t think about them too much – just throw them up there!

The Battle Returns

In Uncategorized on July 3, 2012 at 3:10 pm

 

I am very sorry to report that the “Battle of the Netherlands” is beginning its “2nd edition”.

After a year and a half, I thought I was home free. Not so, it appears. Just when I thought it was safe to come out from under the bed, who do I run smack into? The “boogeyman”, again – bigger and scarier than before!

At first I ran through almost every emotion – fear, anger, defeat, disappointment, back to anger and so on. But this time it took much less time for the dominant emotion to surface, and that is determination. After all, my first battle with this monster turned me into a “tough old broad”, so though the other emotions do intrude occasionally for cameo appearances, determination has definitely won the day. I learned in the first “Battle of the Netherlands” about the true power of love and friendship. The outpouring of love and caring is what really saved the day last time and is still there today; I feel it every minute of every day. I carry it with me now and it makes a huge difference.

So off I go to Denver for more tests and talks with doctors. I do not think I am going to like what I hear but I will have my beautiful prayer quilt with me and together we will be ready to hear whatever it is.